Pornographic content is easily available online, and it may seem like a private activity that no one ever needs to know about. But is watching porn cheating if you’re a Christian? Yes, according to the Bible, it is.
Sexual Impurity and Christianity
God wants people to save their bodies for marriage and never stray from their partners. By watching porn, you commit adultery and lust because you aren’t staying pure in the eyes of God. Sexual impurity in a Christian relationship causes serious issues that affect your relationship and faith.
Why sexual impurity is a sin:
- The Bible Says So. Lust is considered a sin of the heart, and adultery is a sin of the body. Jesus’ point in Matthew 5 is that, contrary to the culture of the time, one is not less bad than the other. God wants your heart, not just your obedience.
- Infidelity is Destructive. In a marriage, secrets and infidelity can damage the relationship and your partner. It implies feelings of inadequacy and unwantedness. By watching porn, you’re isolating yourself from your partner and destroying your intimacy.
- A Strong Relationship Demands Faithfulness. The world is full of sin, and sometimes it’s difficult to remain faithful to God’s plan. But to have a strong relationship with God, you must persevere and push through the temptations.
Is Watching Porn Cheating for Christians?
For most Christians, porn viewership is considered an act of unfaithfulness. Watching porn harms relationships as the user of porn can become emotionally unavailable to their partner and sexually disconnected. It also can cause serious emotional and psychological damage through repeated betrayal. Not to mention lying and gaslighting to cover it up, much of which is exactly like the act of physically cheating.
Matt Wenger, Clinical Director at Boulder Recovery, said most Christians consider porn use an act of unfaithfulness, and it’s a common temptation for Christian men.
“Words like ‘infidelity’ or ‘cheating’ are sometimes used for porn usage in Christian marriages, but are most often reserved for physical, sexual acts with a person outside the marriage,” he said.
The Potential Consequences of Porn Use
While in the moment, watching porn seems to fulfill a need, there are consequences to the behavior. Watching porn could affect not only you but your family, friends, work, and church community.
Repeatedly watching porn to deal with adverse emotions, including sadness or stress, could result in porn addiction.
Signs that you may have porn addiction include:
- You hide or lie about your porn habits.
- You clear your browser history or take other steps to avoid getting caught.
- The type of porn you watch escalates over time.
- You start to prefer watching porn over sex with your spouse.
- You develop an expectation for your sex life to be like the porn you watch
- Watching porn interferes with your career, social connections, or marriage
- You try to stop watching porn, but you can’t
Developing a pornography addiction doesn’t happen overnight. And it may indicate a bigger emotional health concern. You may need help to stop your porn addiction.
Preventing Porn Use
Don’t lose hope! There are ways to recover from porn addiction or just stop porn use. Allow yourself to be open to the healing journey and use your Christian faith as strength to persevere.
Ways to prevent porn use:
- Communicate With Your Partner. Tell your partner when you feel the urge to look at porn and allow them to support you. Communicate your desires and try to share that intimately with your partner.
- Be Honest With Your Partner. By being honest, you help combat trust issues within the relationship and allow your partner a chance to let you in again. Your partner is there to support you without judgment or ridicule. Allow them the chance to be there for you.
- Heal Unresolved Trauma. By visiting with a mental health professional and seeking therapy, you could heal unresolved trauma that will allow you to move past pornography and into your desired life.
- Turn to Spiritual Guidance. Seek support from trusted members of your church that will allow you to call on them in times of need. Seek friendship and prayer to help you through your darkest moments.
- Have a Strong Relationship. Take moments out of each day to build a stronger relationship with your partner and God. Do little things that can add up and show improvement and a willingness to change.
Boulder Recovery Can Help
If viewing porn has become something you can’t stop doing or it’s impacting your intimate relationships, Boulder Recovery can help. We offer treatment for men with porn, sex, and intimacy issues through our 14-day Christian Men’s Intensive program. Contact us today to begin your healing journey.
For more than 20 years, Doug Harsch worked as both a pastor and lay counselor in the city of Chicago. Feeling called in a new direction, he completed his Masters in Mental Health Counseling from Trinity International University.
